Well I guess I’ll be the first to say it out loud [via blog]. What’s the deal with people who cry over recently deceased as if it’s their other half that died, when it’s barely an acquaintance?
I’d like to say I’m going to “watch my words” in this, but I feel that in my own personal blog, I am fully entitled to speak my mind. Uncensored and uncut. I warned you, so read no further if I am going to offend you – and also be aware that I am speaking honestly here. If you find fault in that, good riddance.
I WANT TO KNOW. Why do people PRETEND to mourn? I wish that this were an "extreme case" or rare occurrence--nothing worth a second thought. Unfortunately, however, it has become a growing trend.
Let me be more specific, in my last attempt to not offend readers. Although, if you find this to be an accusation, you're guilty in my book already.
1. You don't know the person who passed away. AT ALL.
2. You knew them and met them a time or two, through a mutual friend.
3. You no longer know them, so there's a 50/50 chance here that your mourning is sincere. You may miss the kid you built sand castles with every summer, but not the one who stepped on them, even though you've known them an equal amount of time.
AND THIS IS WHY I THINK YOU'RE WEIRD.
1. You immediately got a tattoo with their name, but probably don't know their middle initial. [so drunk that you allowed it to be spelled incorrectly is equal... or worse]
2. Your feel that facebook is a thoughtful way to express your grief with others.
3. (#2 cont'd) AND you seek out sympathy from others, specifically through social media vs. attending services, reconnecting with mutual friends, the list goes on.
First and foremost, I am a sucker for a sad story. I'm currently watching the MLB draft, and this one kid, Albert Almora's grandparents died right before he came home from a traveling championship game. Guess who cried? THIS GIRL. With that said, I'm inredibly sympathetic even if a person doesn't directly affect me.
HOWEVER. I am not tweeting about how depressed I am that God took an angel from Almora, whose names I don't know, who I've never met in my life, WHILE taking away much deserved sympathy from the family.
Are you still following?
As one of COUNTLESS people who have unfortunately suffered the loss of a loved one, I realize am walking thin ice here. But from my experience, I must say, it is truly upsetting that some people allow their selfish, self-centered attitudes seek attention from those around them, while simultaneously, I believe, disrespecting the grief that family and friends are facing. What is the motivation behind people who intentionally behave in such a disgusting way?
For the record, I ALMOST effortlessly hope for the best in people, and never actually WANT to believe that there are people like this in the world, but that's reality. I've seen it happen a million times, but at the risk of going to hell, I will only share one experience. This one is a little different. Recently, a girl that I grew up with died in the middle of the night. I didn't perform the autopsy, so chill out. But what we have learned from family members and friends is that she took her life.
What boggles my mind is that I have not heard anyone speak her name in years, and all of a sudden its RIP all over Facebook. Which isn't my issue. In fact, I have no true issue at all. But it did aggravate me when I felt like I was being portrayed as this huge bitch for not caring.
Do not confuse this with me not feeling bad for her family, our mutual friends, and experiencing an overall sadness that someone was facing so many demons that she felt that was her only way to conquer them.
Suddenly, everyone had posted that we had lost such a fun-loving, caring and happy soul. OBVIOUSLY SHE WAS NOT HAPPY, SO WERE YOU EVEN FRIENDS WITH HER? It doesn't actually matter to me whether they were or not. But this particular individual was once a friend of mine. Back when we were young and friendships weren't truly genuine. I think I had about 200 football shape folded notes from her in seventh grade... but that may also be the last time I spoke to her, and I can tell you those notes were tossed not long after. They held no significance.
I have no doubt she was a genuine friend to some, and loved by them tremendously. She was a story teller. Her extravagant, exciting life was incredibly false. Surely [hopefully] it had truths. But growing up with her I witnessed some screwed up exaggerations that were the basis of who she was. Not to mention, she wasn't a kind person. In fact, she bullied me after years of being friends and pulled the ADOPTED card. Who the FUCK makes fun of someone for that? That stuff rolled off my back, I hold no grudges, I swear on my own loved ones. But it happened, and it was sick, and it was an ongoing battle. She was obnoxious, and disrespectful, and feared by many because of her bad attitude and physically aggressive threats.
She just screams sweetheart.
My point is -- of course her friends were sad. I hope to God her friends knew she was struggling, because 99% of the time, people who act out to seek attention are the ones who are the most unsatisfied with themselves, and the affects are truly tragic. But please, strangers, who don't even know what state she lived in last, don't tell everyone how amazing she was and that you're in such shock. And do NOT take away the much deserved and desired sympathy of the family.
I didn't fully indulge myself in this post, and I didn't share my true thoughts [believe it or not] on this situation or one much closer to my heart -- when a close friend of mine passed away and people who I SWEAR never met him were so dramatic. Because I just have to think positively that he was truly that inspiring during both life and death. [he has certainly inspired me every day.]
Take this message exactly how you would like. But no where in here did I feel warm and fuzzy or think that she was truly apologetic -- mostly because the "done nothing but apologize for it" part was bullshit and I've never spoken to her since high school, much less sat through an apology I didn't care to hear. And it's also quite flattering that she doesn't miss me, but misses us being enemies?? I mean what else does this even mean?! I am hard headed. I do not so much agree with the one sided part. Either way, I have plenty of friends... and I can't be bothered with ones whose apologies have personal motives. Maybe she was trying to truly turn over a new leaf. Only she knows how many people she tried to do this with and its success rate.
Whether you agree about this particular scenario or not, I know you can relate to it.
I WANT TO KNOW. Why do people PRETEND to mourn? I wish that this were an "extreme case" or rare occurrence--nothing worth a second thought. Unfortunately, however, it has become a growing trend.
Let me be more specific, in my last attempt to not offend readers. Although, if you find this to be an accusation, you're guilty in my book already.
1. You don't know the person who passed away. AT ALL.
2. You knew them and met them a time or two, through a mutual friend.
3. You no longer know them, so there's a 50/50 chance here that your mourning is sincere. You may miss the kid you built sand castles with every summer, but not the one who stepped on them, even though you've known them an equal amount of time.
AND THIS IS WHY I THINK YOU'RE WEIRD.
1. You immediately got a tattoo with their name, but probably don't know their middle initial. [so drunk that you allowed it to be spelled incorrectly is equal... or worse]
2. Your feel that facebook is a thoughtful way to express your grief with others.
3. (#2 cont'd) AND you seek out sympathy from others, specifically through social media vs. attending services, reconnecting with mutual friends, the list goes on.
First and foremost, I am a sucker for a sad story. I'm currently watching the MLB draft, and this one kid, Albert Almora's grandparents died right before he came home from a traveling championship game. Guess who cried? THIS GIRL. With that said, I'm inredibly sympathetic even if a person doesn't directly affect me.
HOWEVER. I am not tweeting about how depressed I am that God took an angel from Almora, whose names I don't know, who I've never met in my life, WHILE taking away much deserved sympathy from the family.
Are you still following?
As one of COUNTLESS people who have unfortunately suffered the loss of a loved one, I realize am walking thin ice here. But from my experience, I must say, it is truly upsetting that some people allow their selfish, self-centered attitudes seek attention from those around them, while simultaneously, I believe, disrespecting the grief that family and friends are facing. What is the motivation behind people who intentionally behave in such a disgusting way?
For the record, I ALMOST effortlessly hope for the best in people, and never actually WANT to believe that there are people like this in the world, but that's reality. I've seen it happen a million times, but at the risk of going to hell, I will only share one experience. This one is a little different. Recently, a girl that I grew up with died in the middle of the night. I didn't perform the autopsy, so chill out. But what we have learned from family members and friends is that she took her life.
What boggles my mind is that I have not heard anyone speak her name in years, and all of a sudden its RIP all over Facebook. Which isn't my issue. In fact, I have no true issue at all. But it did aggravate me when I felt like I was being portrayed as this huge bitch for not caring.
Do not confuse this with me not feeling bad for her family, our mutual friends, and experiencing an overall sadness that someone was facing so many demons that she felt that was her only way to conquer them.
Suddenly, everyone had posted that we had lost such a fun-loving, caring and happy soul. OBVIOUSLY SHE WAS NOT HAPPY, SO WERE YOU EVEN FRIENDS WITH HER? It doesn't actually matter to me whether they were or not. But this particular individual was once a friend of mine. Back when we were young and friendships weren't truly genuine. I think I had about 200 football shape folded notes from her in seventh grade... but that may also be the last time I spoke to her, and I can tell you those notes were tossed not long after. They held no significance.
I have no doubt she was a genuine friend to some, and loved by them tremendously. She was a story teller. Her extravagant, exciting life was incredibly false. Surely [hopefully] it had truths. But growing up with her I witnessed some screwed up exaggerations that were the basis of who she was. Not to mention, she wasn't a kind person. In fact, she bullied me after years of being friends and pulled the ADOPTED card. Who the FUCK makes fun of someone for that? That stuff rolled off my back, I hold no grudges, I swear on my own loved ones. But it happened, and it was sick, and it was an ongoing battle. She was obnoxious, and disrespectful, and feared by many because of her bad attitude and physically aggressive threats.
She just screams sweetheart.
My point is -- of course her friends were sad. I hope to God her friends knew she was struggling, because 99% of the time, people who act out to seek attention are the ones who are the most unsatisfied with themselves, and the affects are truly tragic. But please, strangers, who don't even know what state she lived in last, don't tell everyone how amazing she was and that you're in such shock. And do NOT take away the much deserved and desired sympathy of the family.
I didn't fully indulge myself in this post, and I didn't share my true thoughts [believe it or not] on this situation or one much closer to my heart -- when a close friend of mine passed away and people who I SWEAR never met him were so dramatic. Because I just have to think positively that he was truly that inspiring during both life and death. [he has certainly inspired me every day.]
Take this message exactly how you would like. But no where in here did I feel warm and fuzzy or think that she was truly apologetic -- mostly because the "done nothing but apologize for it" part was bullshit and I've never spoken to her since high school, much less sat through an apology I didn't care to hear. And it's also quite flattering that she doesn't miss me, but misses us being enemies?? I mean what else does this even mean?! I am hard headed. I do not so much agree with the one sided part. Either way, I have plenty of friends... and I can't be bothered with ones whose apologies have personal motives. Maybe she was trying to truly turn over a new leaf. Only she knows how many people she tried to do this with and its success rate.
Whether you agree about this particular scenario or not, I know you can relate to it.
again little lady, well said... <3
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